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The law says that it can grant a divorce only when it is proved that a marriage ‘has irrevocably broken down’. Like the tooth that is gone, there will be a hole inside which cannot be filled up with wine, serial dating, drugs or brawls with your favourite buddies. But after sometime, one would get used to chewing without that tooth, start enjoying the relief, and when the wound has healed, you can get another tooth put in there. That explains why divorce date sites are booming all over the UK. Many people have done better in their careers after a second start at life. Many more have gone on to find new and enduring loves. And there are those who have really turned out to be the winners. We are supposed to learn from our failures, but we usually keep this fact at arm’s length as a bit of useless moral advice. The champions are those who have come to appreciate the gift of life more after divorce, and have taken the pains to go for a thorough introspection before moving on. The best way to understand an abstract notion like success is to look at examples. Keeping that in mind, below are the stories of three people who have turned out better after their divorce, though they were in a mess to begin with. The Journalist Tess Stimson was a woman of steel. A television journalist with ITN and CNN, she spent years in Beirut, covered news from the firing line in Somalia, and survived an air crash in Kenya. Her fellow reporters were often stunned at her levelheadedness in the face of life-threatening situations. The audience always got first hand news from her, no safe file photos when Tess is around. She was married to colleague Brent Sadler, and was living with him in Beirut, bringing up her two sons, walking them home as if she was in the middle of an idyllic USA countryside landscape. When the children were three and six years of age, she learnt that her husband was having an extramarital affair with a common friend. Tess handled herself with commendable calm, went through a neat divorce, and came back to Florida with her kids, where she took up writing. In time, her novels started selling very well; she fell in love again, and married for the second time. In the middle of all this sunshine, Tess had a panic attack one day. It was a strong and inexplicable physical phenomenon, and she could not understand why she was having it just when she had settled in so wonderfully. Slowly, and through a painful process of self-analysis, Tess came to realise that her body was teaching her to look at her mind. She realised there had been faults in her impeccable conduct before, and accepted the divorce for the first time without bitter accusations. Today, Tess is stronger for her realisation of her vulnerability. The Footballer We all remember Tony Adams – the footballer for England and his team Arsenal. Girls had swooned over him, he had been brand ambassador for big names, and adorned the tabloids. We also remember his descent into alcoholism, the headlines blaring as he got jailed for drunk driving, and was packed off to a rehabilitation centre. Just when he had somehow managed to get over his binge drinking habits, he got embroiled in a painful divorce. He was out of the headlines for sometime after that. But Tony Adams is bouncing back with his candid autobiography ‘Addicted’. His introspection is obvious, and he has been healed by going through the roughest patch of his life with grit and determination. He deserves a cheering crowd for this great score against fate. The Beatle Sir Paul McCartney had not been conducting himself gracefully. The celebrity divorce with Heather Mills and their tussle over Sir Paul’s monetary assets have raised quite a few eyebrows and there is an undercurrent of a collective snigger. But the Beatle is beginning to show his better and, we hope, true colours again. A truce has been called by both sides, and the greatest cementing factor is their little daughter Bea. The parents have started meeting again, and actually behaving amicably with each other. Sir Paul is also getting ready to launch his twenty-first album. The moral is clear – the spirit will triumph – if we give it a chance.
Article Source: http://www.articlewarehouse.net
James Walsh is a freelance writer and copy editor. For more information on getting a Divorce see www.quickie-divorce.com
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